Scrappy Hearts

Notes from a Marriage - Ten Months In

Mark took this photo of us on Sunday, at my niece's birthday party. Funny, when we hang around the house I am less likely to take self-portraits. So happy my hubby snapped this one of us!

We have been married for ten months.

Right now,

we are in a good place.

time together is not only fun, but comfortable.

we have eased into cohabitation with very little distress.

life flows.

I do my thing and he does his thing, both in the same house.

household chores are shared without much conversation. It just happens.

Right now, I would say, we are happy. 

What more could we ask for?

Today...

My husband made a trip to Starbucks for coffee beans and brought me back breakfast and a venti chai latte! Yum!Today, was day two, of wearing my Giants' NFC Conference T-shirt. I have been wearing a long-sleeved shirt underneath so I should be able to get one more days wear before it needs to be washed. Right?Today, I stopped at Genuardi's to get my husband some salsa and look what I saw. Yup, the cherry trees have blossomed already. Can you see the pink? I am not thinking that that is such a good thing.Today we went to the gym and I ran/walked 2 miles and I did my physical therapy exercises. Tomorrow we hit the pool.

Tonight we ended our evening at the Ritz Theater enjoying their production of CATS. Now, a cup of tea and a couple of cookies...a great evening.

Things are Changing

Sometimes I don't think that's such a good thing.

Sometimes it is, I guess it is all perspective. But, this thing I'm talking about, not so good.

I have begun to eat like my husband. You know, proteins and carbs at every meal. Dinner every night. What's with that?

My body is excitedly taking it all in, and keeping it all in. My clothes are getting tight and new ones are not in the budget. So, I have to up my physical activity, yet again. I now have a seven day pass to LA Fitness, perhaps that's the ticket. Well, we will see...this will become my new mantra:

Exercise to stimulate, not to annihilate. The world wasn't formed in a day, and neither were we. Set small goals and build upon them.

Lee Haney

First Date Night - 2012

Not really sure if you could consider this a date night, but it was great getting out for a quick bite and just enjoying each others company. Mark had been hankering for a burger so off we went to try out Bobby's Burger Palace over at the Cherry Hill Mall.

I couldn't believe that they serve up a burger just the way I like it no roll, with a salad. Yum!Mark ordered an LA Burger with a vanilla milkshake, while ordered up a Dallas Burger, topless which comes on a salad. Delish!

A quick stop in the mall with reward dollars yielded a shirt for me and a rice cooker for the hubby. Then it was home for a viewing of Shop Around the Corner. Love that movie.

All in all, a great evening. TGIF

Notes from a Marriage - Nine Months In

Boy oh boy. Nine months, and they said it wouldn't last! Ha!Actually, no one said it wouldn't last. I think they said, "she'll drive him crazy." And, perhaps I have. But, nine months in and things are going well.

We have negotiated space in this small house and are very happy with the results. We have both decided, simultaneously but not together, to hold off on any more work in the house. We feel the need to get into a routine and see how we actually live and use the house before we try anymore organizing.

Mark is busy writing, every day and he has a handle on the bills. That was a job I hated! Me, I still go to work teaching second graders, but I no longer have to do all of the household chores myself. That being said, I do love laundry and vacuuming. We take turns cooking and my husband always does the dishes. Another one of those chores that I despise. Me, I always take out the trash, another chore I enjoy, go figure!

I am trying to learn to relax, that's not going to well, but I have taken the time to do what I want on many occasions and that is refreshing. Together we have started the Couch to 5K program, not that we love running, we are trying to keep active. Our first race on March 17th, we'll see if we make it.

We have started attending yoga once a week, which we do love. We try to spend some quality time together everyday. That is not always easy but, we make the attempt.

And, from my perspective, nine months in, things are looking pretty good!

Notes from a Marriage - Six Months In

Saturday marked our sixth month anniversary. We almost missed it!

In reality, we have about two weeks of really living "married" under our belts at this point and things are going well, all things considered. Mark arrived in the wee morning hours of October 7th. The weekend was spent trying to get the truck emptied into the house and my stuff out of the way to allow that to happen.

Then, just two days later, I had my kitchen accident. Needless to say, our focus changed rather quickly and the timetable we had set up for ourselves, well, what timetable?

We are doing the best we can. Mark is a terrific caregiver and I am a not so terrific patient. So, we take each day as it comes. We are spending more time together than we thought we would, primarily because of the accident and my inability to go back to work at this time.

We have established a plan for the house and we are making good progress towards seeing that through. We have bought a television and, hold your breath, ordered cable. 

We were able to celebrate Mark's birthday with dinner out, but most of our time is spent here at home. I tire easily and sometimes I have difficulty managing the pain.

From this point foward, we are a co-habitating couple. The house I shared with my children is now our home and that feels good. Here's to the next few months, settling into routines and enjoying our time together.

 

The View From Sunday

Boy does time fly. It feels like I was just getting out of bed on Saturday and now the weekend is over. Never enough time, especially now that I move at a snail's pace.

Friday night brought me a visit from a dear friend bearing treats from my friends at work. What a nice surprise! My accident has really put a burden on the wonderful teachers with whom I work. I was really unable to do anything last week and they did a stellar job of making sure my students and substitute had everything they needed. And, they sent me a wonderful gift basket.What a blessing!

Saturday I had a visit from my nieces and my sister. They were delivering my birthday present. Now, if I burn down the house, I have appropriate outside seating to watch the show! And, I have a mermaid, how cool is that?Saturday, Mark put his organizing skills to work and figured out a plan for my workspace and our tv viewing area. I was not quite prepared for the process to begin, but we did get the entertainment center moved and one of my bookshelves emptied! Woohoo! We are making progress.  

I know that it really doesn't look like much was accomplished, but we feel good about it and that's all that matters at the moment! Now that I think about it, we also organized the drawers in my dresser and my closet. So really, that was quite a bit that we accomplished!Today Mark painted the bedroom that will become his office and I worked on lesson plans for the week and sub-plans for Monday. Not sure how much longer I will be out of school. The biggest concern with burns, or one of the biggest concerns I should say, is the chance of infection. Keeping the burned areas covered and free from infection is critical.

Cindy and Eileen came over and raided my stash. One hundred sheets of cardstock later I have a bit more room in my scrapbooking closet. It was good to visit for a bit. I did manage my favorite Sunday chore of changing the sheets on the bed and doing laundry. It is not all folded, but it is all done. And, I did the bed on my own! 

I spoke to both my children today, the Giants won and I was able to open the windows and let the fall breeze fill the house. A good day!

The Healing Process

is definitely not easy. Thursday I was lulled into believing that the healing process would be easy. Very little pain and lots of easy movement. "This is going to be a cakewalk," so I thought. I took no painkillers on Thursday and suffered throughout the night as I tried to sleep and find some comfort. I woke up at 5am with my hands and belly burning, not unlike the pain I felt the first evening. What a rude awakening.

Friday and Saturday were difficult. Torn between sitting around doing very little while experiencing pain and trying desperately to help Mark make sense of this mess I have created. One closet did get cleaned and the tv was moved. We have a plan for the house, and that's a good thing. About my hands and belly, the only plan we have is to head back to the burn center on Monday, a day early. I am very nervous about a few things and the anxiety just isn't helping. 

I don't know if you can tell, but all of my knuckles have blisters which peak out from under the bandages, so afraid they will open. Physical therapy includes making a fist with my hand and then taking my thumb and stretching it to the base of my pinky, among other things, something I am struggling with right now.   My right hand fared better, but still requires therapy and still aches as the blisters stretched from my palm to the back of my hand. The blisters were removed my first night in the hospital the trick now is to keep the new skin stretched so that I do not loose movement or use of either of my hands. A strong enough reason to endure the pain. Just ain't no way I am going to stop quilting or scrapbooking!Unfortunately, I am a leftie. This is my left hand today. While my husband works feverishly to make our house a home that fits both of us, I work feverishly to restore movement to my left arm. Today I will be pinning some quilt blocks and perhaps some hand sewing. The physical therapist thinks they key to restoring full use of my hand is going to be fine motor movements. I am bound and determined.

Now I am off to do laundry and listen to my Giants as I try to accomplish my Sunday chores and my physical therapy. 

For Better or Worse

I am thinking that this constitutes, "worse." 

It all started so innocently. A great recipe. An early night home from work. And then...

As I leaned over to take the pan from the oven, my shirt caught fire. It did not hit a heating element, it did not hit the pan, there were no open flames. But, still, something caused my shirt to burst into flames.

At first, when I felt the warm air I thought, "another hot flash." However, when I looked down, the flames greeted me by traveling up my shirt into my face. I did not respond fast enough, I was in shock. I fumbled to pull the shirt over my head and off. I could not get the flames to subside. My arms suffered the most as I managed to get the shirt, flames and all, off. Most of it went into the sink, some of the flaming shirt fell on the floor. Then I collapsed.

My poor husband came downstairs to find me crouched by the sink, wimpering at first and then screaming. Definitely one of my "worse" moments.

Today, I am home from the hospital, beginning the physical therapy to regain movement in my left hand while I am fully wrapped in bandages designed to help my skin to rejuvenate. My left hand and arm suffered the most, unfortunately I am a leftie. My right hand is wrapped to the wrist and my belly has some bandages.

I am very grateful that my husband was here to manage the situation because I certainly was of no help. He got me to the hospital quickly and stated my case so clearly that I was seen immediately. The emergency room at Virtua knew that my situation warranted a burn center and they quickly arranged to have me transported to Crozer in Chester. 

The care I received from both hospitals was tremendous. I never knew how important it is to keep the area where burns are treated sterile. I spent my time at Crozer in a single room where people donned gowns, masks and gloves before entering. I have witnessed remarkably talented people do their best work to care for my wounds and psyche. Today I know that I am truly blessed.

Starting Normal

Today, I returned to work and Mark set about settling himself into this little place we call home. It wasn't an easy day for either of us. But, we are moving forward.

It was a beautiful day, as days go, and I was able to catch a real glimpse of the beauty of fall right outside the post office.Perhaps my favorite photo from today:  As stressful as our days may get, it is good to finally be together. It is good to be moving forward, together. Absolutely grateful for today and the subtle reminder of what is most important.